*hiccup*
tried to say some-
*hiccup*
-thing and just
*hiccup*
couldn't say it
*hiccup*
because of your darn
*hiccup*
HICCUPS?!?!?!?!
It can be EXTREMELY frustrating.
However...
I have a solution.
A quite simple one, really...
My theory was first tested when I was a kid, doing stupid kid things, while left to the devices of my own thoughts and imagination.
(I must have actually learned something in school to apply this knowledge to something like Hiccups)...
One day, while sitting alone in my room, I felt a burp starting to form. As a kid (and a teenager) I drank a lot of soda... And as most, who have drank ANY kind of carbonated beverage would know, that bubbles in the tummy can rumble back up quite loudly and obnoxiously.
As I knew this would be the case, in my situation, at that moment, I did not want to project the rude display of bodily functions into the atmosphere.
So I patted myself on the top of the head a few times.
Awesome.
Problem solved. No more bubbly-rumbles.
.....
........... ..........
................ ...............
brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt.
(ooops.
excuse me.....).
Okay. Maybe that wasn't the most effective way to solve my problem...
.... at least, in THAT instance.
(and yes, it has still occasionally worked again).
So, time continued on....
...yet I knew there was some aspect of life and the human body that I could applicably use my hypothesized notions of bubbles in the gut and redirecting rumbles into a different form of execution from the human body.
And then one day, the epiphany came.
And was tested.
And approved.
I was having one of those fits of hiccups that,
as I described before,
were brutally jolting to the body.
The kind that make your whole chest expand and thrust the rest of you body into uncontrollable flails of limbs and a head-bobb to match.
Suddenly, after attempting to do the whole "hold your breath, deep in your belly" tactic failed for the umpteenth time this current hiccup session, I remembered my childhood experiment with the burp-turned-brrrrrt....
...Could I apply this same knowledge to my dilemma, at this moment, with these body-rocking disturbances to my inner gases??
Ahem.......
brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt.
Yea. It works.
Within moments, the hiccups had completely subsided.
No ifs, ands, or...
....butts!!
After my new found way to apply my childhood-learned knowledge, I of course had to share the facts of my findings to my family...
...and with my mate, being the comic relief for awkward and uncomfortable - or new dance crave - situations, he used these facts to create a farscicle act of the Glories of the Human Body.
Again, I had the hiccups one day; creating my next groove-style in the process, I headed to the restroom to expel my liquid human-ness.
...From the other side of the door, I heard an imitation rumble....
brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt.
(from Jeremiah)
(...and then a real
brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt.
from Me...
(and then, I totally giggled at myself).
So, the next time your chest is poppin and your head is bobbin, like you've made some crazy new dance:
Make a toot and call it a goose!
And your hiccups will be GONE!! (like the Golden Goose Egg! *just don't lay it next to me!*)
Hiccuping, farting, and giggling.....
....self-tested kid experiments turned Dance-craze to gastronomical heights!
(Wanna Jig with me??)
[And for the record, I have 2 other hypotheses proven cases - but their participation will stay in the family ;-) ].
- Omegan :-D
